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Agree BoredPanda Login Add Post Search ArtPhotographyAnimalsFunnyTravelIllustrationComicsDIYGood NewsParentingChallengeAsk Pandas More Featured Trending Latest Newsletter The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Bored Panda “That Was It”: Man Has Had Enough Of In-Laws Visiting Without Notice Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact 136points 1.5K Parenting, People1 month ago

“ That Was It” Man Has Had Enough Of In-Laws Visiting Without Notice Interview

Adelaide Ross and
Vėja Elkimavičiūtė
A new baby is thrilling for everyone in the family.

It's understandable for grandparents, aunts and uncles to rush to see the newborn and want to be around as much as possible to help out and bond with the tiniest member of the family. But there are still common courtesies that apply to visiting relatives, and it's important to not make the new parents' lives any harder.

They want to enjoy this time with their little one too, and if they don't need any extra help, visiting too often can be more of a curse than a blessing. One father recently shared on Reddit that he has found himself wrapped up in conflict with his in-laws after attempting to set boundaries on when they were allowed to visit. He wanted some outside opinions on whether or not he was being reasonable, so below, you'll find the father's full explanation of the situation, as well as an interview between him and Bored Panda, and some of the replies his post received.

Let us know what you think about all of this in the comments, and then if you're looking for even more articles detailing drama between in-laws, you can find a couple more juicy stories here and here.  

This father is wondering if he was justified in laying down the law and setting boundaries with his in-laws

Image credits: Jessica Furtney (not the actual photo) Image credits: Bored Panda (not the actual photo) Image credits: Helena Lopes (not the actual photo) Image credits: johnbilbobadger We reached out to this father on Reddit to hear if there had been any updates on the situation since he posted about it online, and he is happy to report that the conflict has been resolved. "Everything went better, my in-laws understood, and now we have a good relationship," he told Bored Panda. We also asked him if the relationship between him and his in-laws had been tumultuous in the past.

"We've had a couple of issues before, but none of them were bad enough," he shared. "I think this time I lost it because I have a thing for privacy and boundaries." We also asked the father how it felt reading all of the replies that his post received reassuring him that he was not the jerk in the situation. "At first I felt supported, it was all good, but when it went sort of viral I felt bad because even if I was not the [jerk], I felt like an attention [seeker], and that was definitely not the point," he told Bored Panda.

"You know, 10 people telling you you're NTA is cool, but hundreds of people telling you that (some of them just saying I should get a divorce) kinda defeats the purpose," he explained. "Maybe in the end, I felt like I was indeed the [jerk] just for posting that instead of talking to my wife at the time." "I do think anyone should call before visiting, but sometimes I regret posting my situation because I don't like that level of attention," the father admitted.

He is certainly justified in his desire for privacy and boundaries within his family, but I can also understand how the post blowing up might have been a lot to handle. Thankfully, the situation has been resolved, so if you'd like to share your thoughts below, please keep in mind that there is no need to harp on the in-laws.

Let's keep it kind, pandas. And if you've ever found yourself in drama with your in-laws, feel free to share how you managed to navigate those situations.

Readers have assured the father that he was being perfectly reasonable and his boundaries should be respected

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Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Share on Facebook Adelaide Ross Follow Unfollow Adelaide Ross Writer, BoredPanda staff Adelaide Ross is a writer at Bored Panda. She is originally from Texas and has a Bachelor of Fine Arts Degree in Acting from Oklahoma City University.

In the years since her graduation, she has lived in Los Angeles, Sweden, England and now Lithuania. In her free time, Adelaide enjoys traveling, experimenting with new vegan recipes, taking long walks in parks (wearing plenty of SPF!) and crafting the perfect glass of cold brew.

Read more » Vėja Elkimavičiūtė Vėja Elkimavičiūtė Author, BoredPanda staff Vėja is a photo editor at Bored Panda. After dropping out of university she took Adobe creative courses and started looking for a job to learn more about this type of work. She wants to deepen her knowledge in graphic design and one day make illustrations for books, magazines, etc.

In her free time, she enjoys gaming and watching anime
Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! You May Like Groom Is Stood Up By His Parents At His Own Wedding Because Of Sister, His Best Friend Comes Up With The Best Revenge Plan Mindaugas Balčiauskas MIL Barely Sees Her Grandkids, Lies That Husband Doesn’t Want Them In Their House, Later Gets Exposed In Front Of The Whole Family Monika Pašukonytė MIL Decided To Wear White To Son's Wedding, So The Bride Made Every Bridesmaid Wear White While She Wore Pink Mindaugas Balčiauskas Popular on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million Join the conversation POST Amanda Jayne Amanda Jayne Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago My own mother did this to me, brought her colleagues round to see 'her' baby, after I'd expressly asked for a phone call first.

My daughter's birth was so traumatic, we both almost died. She had no signs of life, i haemorraged, needed untold stitches. A bad time.

My lil zombie baby and me needed time to recover. Not be put on parade unannounced. 60 60points reply Annabelle Annabelle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago That’s horrible.

Especially because her colleagues are basically strangers to you. Hope you and the baby are alright now. 36 36points reply Load More Replies...

JD JD Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 month ago (edited) Totally empathise with you Amanda Jayne - I also suffered a traumatic birth with complications - my MIL decided to meet her friend I had never met or heard of, at my hospital bed. Came back from the toilet and this stranger was there - I hid in the nurses section until they left. 15 15points reply Powerful Katrinka Powerful Katrinka Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago I can't get past the part where your MIL referred to your own child as "her" baby.

Sounds like trouble ahead. 14 14points reply April Caron April Caron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago (edited) I have a cute related story to this.

I also used to be irritated by hearing “my baby” when someone said that about my children, but when my niece started talking, she called me “my April.” When asked why, she said, “Because she’s the only April that I have.” And I realized… the word “my” wasn’t about ownership. It symbolized her feelings of connection to me.

In turn, I referred to her as “my Amanda.” Now, when I hear someone say “my baby” about my own children… it’s an indication that person feels connected to and loves my child… and that makes me happy. I’m also aware of the fact that our words can trigger unintended negative emotions in others and so personally, I’m specific if I use the words “my baby.” For example: “my baby nephew” or “my beautiful friend’s baby.” (Side note: Amanda is 25 now and still calls me “my April.”) :-) 8 8points reply Patty O Patty O Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago ?

love that story 2 2points reply But Nobody Came. But Nobody Came.

Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago not MIL just mother, but yes 0 0points reply madbakes madbakes Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago It amazes me that anyone who has given birth is so casual about dropping by after. That's one of the times that boundaries should be taken most seriously.

6 6points reply Emmydearest Emmydearest Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago As an introvert, people coming over unannounced is a personal nightmare. I need my time and my space so I want to be able to invent an excuse if really don't feel like meeting people.

I'm also quite a perfectionist, so I'd hate to show my house and myself when "not in order". If I'm not expecting visitors, the house is not always necessarily clean and tidy; I might be doing some cleaning so I'd be quite sweaty and definitely wearing old comfy clothes, my hair might need a shampoo...

Yeah, no. Absolutely call first.

Or better, wait for my invitation. 31 31points reply April Caron April Caron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Maybe it’s cultural?

I’m Mexican, and in my family… we just show up. “Mi casa is su casa” is a literal saying.

Although, I’m going to add that it applies to only family or close friends that are akin to family. Otherwise, you call first. But I do see this as a boundary issue.

There is nothing wrong with being asked to call first or wait for an invitation. And if you’ve been asked to call first… then you respect that and YOU CALL FIRST!

21 21points reply AK to LV AK to LV Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago It might be a cultural thing. However, if any of my Mexican relatives 'drop by', they wouldn't leave my kitchen a mess. They would bring a meal and offer to do laundry or watch the baby while I slept.

3 3points reply Load More Replies... April Caron April Caron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Same. The inverse is also true.

I can’t count the number of times I’d come home to find one of my aunts cooking dinner, while the other was washing dishes. All of my relatives from Juarez had our garage code, so they could let themselves in. I wanted them to have a place to pit stop if they were in El Paso shopping or what have you.

Once, we had an awful wind storm. Sand was flying everywhere! I knew I’d left my front windows open and I was dreading the mess I’d come home to.

My aunts, uncles, and cousins didn’t feel safe driving in the storm, so they went to my house. No one texted. They just let themselves in.

(Mi casa es su casa.) I came home to find my windows closed, my aunt Palmira had already vacuumed any dirt that had blown in, and my aunt Minerva was cooking sopa, while my uncles watched football. I was sooo happy to see them! 3 3points reply Load More Comments POST Amanda Jayne Amanda Jayne Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago My own mother did this to me, brought her colleagues round to see 'her' baby, after I'd expressly asked for a phone call first.

My daughter's birth was so traumatic, we both almost died. She had no signs of life, i haemorraged, needed untold stitches.

A bad time. My lil zombie baby and me needed time to recover.

Not be put on parade unannounced. 60 60points reply Annabelle Annabelle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago That’s horrible.

Especially because her colleagues are basically strangers to you. Hope you and the baby are alright now.

36 36points reply Load More Replies... JD JD Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 month ago (edited) Totally empathise with you Amanda Jayne - I also suffered a traumatic birth with complications - my MIL decided to meet her friend I had never met or heard of, at my hospital bed. Came back from the toilet and this stranger was there - I hid in the nurses section until they left.

15 15points reply Powerful Katrinka Powerful Katrinka Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago I can't get past the part where your MIL referred to your own child as "her" baby. Sounds like trouble ahead. 14 14points reply April Caron April Caron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago (edited) I have a cute related story to this.

I also used to be irritated by hearing “my baby” when someone said that about my children, but when my niece started talking, she called me “my April.” When asked why, she said, “Because she’s the only April that I have.” And I realized… the word “my” wasn’t about ownership. It symbolized her feelings of connection to me.

In turn, I referred to her as “my Amanda.” Now, when I hear someone say “my baby” about my own children… it’s an indication that person feels connected to and loves my child… and that makes me happy. I’m also aware of the fact that our words can trigger unintended negative emotions in others and so personally, I’m specific if I use the words “my baby.” For example: “my baby nephew” or “my beautiful friend’s baby.” (Side note: Amanda is 25 now and still calls me “my April.”) :-) 8 8points reply Patty O Patty O Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago ?

love that story 2 2points reply But Nobody Came. But Nobody Came.

Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago not MIL just mother, but yes 0 0points reply madbakes madbakes Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago It amazes me that anyone who has given birth is so casual about dropping by after. That's one of the times that boundaries should be taken most seriously.

6 6points reply Emmydearest Emmydearest Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago As an introvert, people coming over unannounced is a personal nightmare. I need my time and my space so I want to be able to invent an excuse if really don't feel like meeting people. I'm also quite a perfectionist, so I'd hate to show my house and myself when "not in order".

If I'm not expecting visitors, the house is not always necessarily clean and tidy; I might be doing some cleaning so I'd be quite sweaty and definitely wearing old comfy clothes, my hair might need a shampoo... Yeah, no. Absolutely call first.

Or better, wait for my invitation. 31 31points reply April Caron April Caron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Maybe it’s cultural? I’m Mexican, and in my family… we just show up.

“Mi casa is su casa” is a literal saying. Although, I’m going to add that it applies to only family or close friends that are akin to family. Otherwise, you call first.

But I do see this as a boundary issue. There is nothing wrong with being asked to call first or wait for an invitation.

And if you’ve been asked to call first… then you respect that and YOU CALL FIRST! 21 21points reply AK to LV AK to LV Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago It might be a cultural thing.

However, if any of my Mexican relatives 'drop by', they wouldn't leave my kitchen a mess. They would bring a meal and offer to do laundry or watch the baby while I slept. 3 3points reply Load More Replies...

April Caron April Caron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Same. The inverse is also true. I can’t count the number of times I’d come home to find one of my aunts cooking dinner, while the other was washing dishes.

All of my relatives from Juarez had our garage code, so they could let themselves in. I wanted them to have a place to pit stop if they were in El Paso shopping or what have you. Once, we had an awful wind storm.

Sand was flying everywhere! I knew I’d left my front windows open and I was dreading the mess I’d come home to. My aunts, uncles, and cousins didn’t feel safe driving in the storm, so they went to my house.

No one texted. They just let themselves in. (Mi casa es su casa.) I came home to find my windows closed, my aunt Palmira had already vacuumed any dirt that had blown in, and my aunt Minerva was cooking sopa, while my uncles watched football.

I was sooo happy to see them! 3 3points reply Load More Comments Popular on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O.

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