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% Gay Woman Inherits Summer House Causes Uproar By Not Letting Her Conservative Family Use It For Free For Weddings Bored Panda Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app Continue in app Continue in browser Like what you're reading? Subscribe to our top stories Please enter email address By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter.
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Bored Panda Gay Woman Inherits Summer House Causes Uproar By Not Letting Her Conservative Family Use It For Free For Weddings Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact 93points 822 People, Relationships1 month ago
Gabija Palšytė
Recently, a 28-year-old woman's story caught everyone's attention on the AITA subreddit. "So I am a 28-year-old woman, I am gay (important to the story).
Gay Woman Inherits Summer House Causes Uproar By Not Letting Her Conservative Family Use It For Free For Weddings
Liucija Adomaite andGabija Palšytė
Recently, a 28-year-old woman's story caught everyone's attention on the AITA subreddit. "So I am a 28-year-old woman, I am gay (important to the story).
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Now my mother is a single mother, she comes from a big conservative Christian family," the author wrote. The author wrote that after her mom had her at 16, they lived with the grandparents until her mother at age 25 came out as gay. "That was the limit for my grandfather and he disowned my mother and my mom cut all contact with her family."
The woman lost her closest ones to Covid, and she inherited the family's summerhouse from her grandma who wanted to make it up as much as she could before she died, too.
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Now, the other relatives have reached out to the author expecting to have their wedding there for free but that's not what the new house owner wanted.
Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: throwawaygayhouse200 Family members fighting over inheritance is as old as history itself.
The woman asks if she was wrong to refuse to let her estranged relatives have a free wedding at the family house she inherited
Image credits: Aubrey Odom-Mabey (not the actual photo)Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: throwawaygayhouse200 Family members fighting over inheritance is as old as history itself.
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Recent research found that there has been an increase in inheritance disputes reported annually since 1985. One of the authors, professor Stephan Köppe explained that there are four main reasons why relatives go to court and they include sibling rivalry, the legacy of divorce, owning a business, and wealth. "Drawing from our court case examples, families should follow a few simple rules.
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Open and honest communication is essential. In many cultures, it is taboo to talk openly about death, but communicating your intentions and expectations during your lifetime will reduce stress and the possibility of unwelcome surprises for your loved ones," prof.
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Köppe wrote in The Conversation. Another key thing, according to prof. Köppe, keeping your promises is key.
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"In other words, don't change your will at the last minute on your deathbed – this can be easily challenged in court."
And finally, children who fear being left out should seek constructive, non-confrontational conversations during the lifetime of their parents. Prof.
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Köppe argues that building such mutual expectations during the lifetime is quintessential.
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The author provided some more background information about the whole situation in the comments
Many people showed their support for the author and said that she was right br br br br br br br
Others however had a different opinion that they shared below
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Share on Facebook Liucija Adomaite Liucija Adomaite Writer, BoredPanda staff Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale.
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Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus. Read more » Gabija Palšytė Gabija Palšytė Author, BoredPanda staff Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda.
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Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature. Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app!
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Download Bored Panda app! You May Like MIL Barely Sees Her Grandkids, Lies That Husband Doesn’t Want Them In Their House, Later Gets Exposed In Front Of The Whole Family Monika Pašukonytė Mother-In-Law Wants To Sleep In Couple's Bed, Can't Take 'No' For An Answer And Starts Marital Drama Mindaugas Balčiauskas 40 Times Weddings Were So Bad, They Deserved To Be Shamed On This Facebook Page Viktorija Ošikaitė Popular on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million Share your thoughts POST WonderWoman WonderWoman Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago If the cousin had a lifelong dream, she should have picked up the phone and talked to the owner so that she could work out the logistics.
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25 25points reply Nightshade1972 Nightshade1972 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Yup. OP isn't saying, "No, you *can't* use the venue, at all," OP's just saying, "You have to pay for it, like any other wedding party. If you're willing to pay, great, we'll set a date, if you're so entitled you think you should get married here for free, then you're gonna be disappointed.
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Your call." 15 15points reply Load More Replies... Pizzagirl 91 Pizzagirl 91 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago For me, it would be different if the bride herself had asked, since she is probably as innocent as OP in the whole estrangement situation, while the aunt was NC with her SISTER and niece until OP's mother died.
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But the manner of asking, and the acknowledgement of the worth of the location, for example through offering to pay for cleaning etc. and not make your cousin your housekeeper for free, would have gone a long way.
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2 2points reply Hakitosama Hakitosama Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 6 days ago Indeed indeed there's the substance and then there's the form (not sure about the translation... In French it's "le fond et la forme") and in the delicate matters of estranged family, the form is as important as the substance 0 0points reply JB JB Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Chuckling at the “Oh but FAMILY…” comments and “what grandma would want”.
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Just because OP is aware of the background doesn’t make these people more than strangers. They had decades to do so, but didn’t bother to reach out to establish a relationship until they wanted something and instead of asking politely, they demanded free access and became hostile when OP said “Not on that date, the house is already booked, but you can pick another date and pay like normal people do.” As for Grandma’s wishes, if she had any, they should have been stated in her will.
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OP had/has every right to treat her inheritance as she chooses. 16 16points reply Alec Alec Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago I think there is a middle ground here that should have been sought.
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Something along the lines of 'you pick a date that is NOT booked, and pay the regular but not the wedding price, you pay some sort of insurance, and you can have your wedding there'. If they reject that, that is on them.
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16 16points reply Monday Monday Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Yeah...I wouldn't charge my relatives full price even if I didn't know them, but then again I've never been ostracized by any of my relatives either so I can't accurately empathize with OP. 8 8points reply Load More Replies...
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Say What Say What Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago They aren't her relatives on any meaningful way. They are complete strangers who publicly attacked her on social media.
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I wouldn't let any strangers who treated me that way anywhere near my house. 9 9points reply Load More Comments POST WonderWoman WonderWoman Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago If the cousin had a lifelong dream, she should have picked up the phone and talked to the owner so that she could work out the logistics.
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25 25points reply Nightshade1972 Nightshade1972 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Yup. OP isn't saying, "No, you *can't* use the venue, at all," OP's just saying, "You have to pay for it, like any other wedding party. If you're willing to pay, great, we'll set a date, if you're so entitled you think you should get married here for free, then you're gonna be disappointed.
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Your call." 15 15points reply Load More Replies... Pizzagirl 91 Pizzagirl 91 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago For me, it would be different if the bride herself had asked, since she is probably as innocent as OP in the whole estrangement situation, while the aunt was NC with her SISTER and niece until OP's mother died.
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But the manner of asking, and the acknowledgement of the worth of the location, for example through offering to pay for cleaning etc. and not make your cousin your housekeeper for free, would have gone a long way. 2 2points reply Hakitosama Hakitosama Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 6 days ago Indeed indeed there's the substance and then there's the form (not sure about the translation...
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In French it's "le fond et la forme") and in the delicate matters of estranged family, the form is as important as the substance 0 0points reply JB JB Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Chuckling at the “Oh but FAMILY…” comments and “what grandma would want”. Just because OP is aware of the background doesn’t make these people more than strangers. They had decades to do so, but didn’t bother to reach out to establish a relationship until they wanted something and instead of asking politely, they demanded free access and became hostile when OP said “Not on that date, the house is already booked, but you can pick another date and pay like normal people do.” As for Grandma’s wishes, if she had any, they should have been stated in her will.
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OP had/has every right to treat her inheritance as she chooses. 16 16points reply Alec Alec Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago I think there is a middle ground here that should have been sought. Something along the lines of 'you pick a date that is NOT booked, and pay the regular but not the wedding price, you pay some sort of insurance, and you can have your wedding there'.
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If they reject that, that is on them. 16 16points reply Monday Monday Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Yeah...I wouldn't charge my relatives full price even if I didn't know them, but then again I've never been ostracized by any of my relatives either so I can't accurately empathize with OP. 8 8points reply Load More Replies...
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Say What Say What Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago They aren't her relatives on any meaningful way. They are complete strangers who publicly attacked her on social media. I wouldn't let any strangers who treated me that way anywhere near my house.
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