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% 148 Fruit Jokes We Just Can't Get Enough Of Bored Panda Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app Continue in app Continue in browser Like what you're reading? Subscribe to our top stories Please enter email address By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter.
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Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Bored Panda 148 Fruit Jokes We Just Can t Get Enough Of Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact 18points x Facebook Pinterest Twitter Funny, Jokes2 weeks ago
Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė
Publish Not your original work?
148 Fruit Jokes We Just Can t Get Enough Of
Neilas Šurkus andJustė Kairytė - Barkauskienė
Publish Not your original work?
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Add source Just when you think that we've exhausted all the possible topics for funny jokes, we pull more out of our sleeves. Yup, as we have once promised, we won't stop delivering cool jokes to you until every possible topic is explored and all the possible laughs have been laughed.
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So now it is time we present you with our latest and greatest selection of fruit jokes! Yup, those sweet and tart edible things you never thought you'd laugh at. Yet here we are!
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And you better believe us when we say that these jokes about fruits are just glorious. Lemons get their share, dragon fruits get their share, and don't forget about bananas!
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Oh, and there's also a sneaky little cameo from tomato since it's a fruit, after all, and is definitely worthy of being sung about in these funny jokes about fruit. So, basically, you name a fruit, and there's a hilarious joke about it on our list!
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So, ready to check out our selection of fruit puns and jokes? If so, just scroll on down below to where all the goodness lies! Once you are there, be sure to vote for the best jokes on fruits you encounter in this list, and once that's all well and done - share this article with your friends. This post may include affiliate links.
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#1 "I was telling my children about the health benefits of eating dried fruits recently. It's really all about raisin awareness." Report 14points POST Headless Roach Headless Roach Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 2 weeks ago You're raisin' your kids well 0 0points reply #2 "I had my first date last night! Such an underrated fruit." Report 14points POST Headless Roach Headless Roach Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 2 weeks ago I recommend a couple of dates next time.
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1 1point reply #3 What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
Neck-tarines! Report 12points POST #4 What did the watermelon say to the cantaloupe?
"You're one in a melon!" Report 12points POST dxisy xo dxisy xo Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 2 weeks ago This one got me 0 0points reply #5 An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
An orange a day keeps the plumber away.
Basically, if you throw fruit at people they go away.
Neck-tarines! Report 12points POST #4 What did the watermelon say to the cantaloupe?
"You're one in a melon!" Report 12points POST dxisy xo dxisy xo Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 2 weeks ago This one got me 0 0points reply #5 An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
An orange a day keeps the plumber away.
Basically, if you throw fruit at people they go away.
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Report 12points POST #6 Why can’t you make a crumble with 3.14 blackberries?
Because that would be a pie! Report 11points POST #7 How many marmalade sandwiches did Paddington Bear eat?
None, he’s already stuffed!
Because that would be a pie! Report 11points POST #7 How many marmalade sandwiches did Paddington Bear eat?
None, he’s already stuffed!
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Report 11points POST #8 What do you call an apple that plays the trumpet?
A tooty fruity! Report 11points POST #9 What do you call the time in-between eating a load of peaches?
A pit stop! Report 11points POST #10 "You may think I'm crazy for eating ham and pineapple sandwiches but hey, that's just Hawaii roll!" Report 11points POST #11 "My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine.
A tooty fruity! Report 11points POST #9 What do you call the time in-between eating a load of peaches?
A pit stop! Report 11points POST #10 "You may think I'm crazy for eating ham and pineapple sandwiches but hey, that's just Hawaii roll!" Report 11points POST #11 "My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine.
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I added some fruit and orange juice. Now she’s sangria than ever." Report 11points POST #12 What did the papa pear tree say to his child pear tree who was too afraid to grow his first fruits?
"Son? Grow a pear." Report 10points POST #13 A tomato walks up to a bunch of fruits in a line.
He says, "Hey guys I'm a fruit, can I hang out with you?"
One turns to him and replies, "No, this is the punch line." Report 10points POST #14 Hear about the fire at the dried fruits factory?
It was an apricotastrophe.
"Son? Grow a pear." Report 10points POST #13 A tomato walks up to a bunch of fruits in a line.
He says, "Hey guys I'm a fruit, can I hang out with you?"
One turns to him and replies, "No, this is the punch line." Report 10points POST #14 Hear about the fire at the dried fruits factory?
It was an apricotastrophe.
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Report 10points POST #15 "My family is divided on the question of imported fruits. My mom says no. Papaya." Report 10points POST #16 What do you call a bunch of strawberries playing instruments together?
A jam session!
A jam session!
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Report 10points POST #17 Which fruit always feels sad?
A blue-berry! Report 10points POST #18 What do you give a sick lemon?
Lemon-Aid!
A blue-berry! Report 10points POST #18 What do you give a sick lemon?
Lemon-Aid!
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Report 10points POST #19 What did the lemon say to the lime?
"Sour you doing?!" Report 10points POST #20 What do you get when you cross apple pie with a Christmas tree?
Pineapple pie! Report 10points POST #21 Why were the chefs shaving peaches?
Because they needed nectarines for the recipe! Report 10points POST #22 What do you call a piece of art made by a fruit?
A masterpeach!
"Sour you doing?!" Report 10points POST #20 What do you get when you cross apple pie with a Christmas tree?
Pineapple pie! Report 10points POST #21 Why were the chefs shaving peaches?
Because they needed nectarines for the recipe! Report 10points POST #22 What do you call a piece of art made by a fruit?
A masterpeach!
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Report 10points POST #23 What did the fruit say to his valentine?
"I love you from my head tomato!" Report 10points POST #24 Why did the tomato go to the ball with a prune?
Because he couldn't find a date! Report 10points POST #25 Husband asked his wife, “Did you know there’s a fruit you can eat that provides your daily requirement of potassium?”
Wife: “That’s bananas.”
Husband: “I know.
"I love you from my head tomato!" Report 10points POST #24 Why did the tomato go to the ball with a prune?
Because he couldn't find a date! Report 10points POST #25 Husband asked his wife, “Did you know there’s a fruit you can eat that provides your daily requirement of potassium?”
Wife: “That’s bananas.”
Husband: “I know.
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I couldn’t believe it either.” Report 10points POST #26 "My wife is on a tropical fruit diet and our fridge is full of strange stuff. It’s enough to make a mango crazy." Report 10points POST #27 Usain bolt must be a fruit.
Have you seen that mango?
Have you seen that mango?
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Report 10points POST #28 I heard a cactus fell in love with a fruit tree.
They make a prickly pear. Report 10points POST #29 "I’m obsessed with sketching pictures of fruit, and I really think I should stop. I have to draw the lime somewhere." Report 10points POST #30 What do you call it when your friends encourage you to eat more fruit?
Pear pressure.
They make a prickly pear. Report 10points POST #29 "I’m obsessed with sketching pictures of fruit, and I really think I should stop. I have to draw the lime somewhere." Report 10points POST #30 What do you call it when your friends encourage you to eat more fruit?
Pear pressure.
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Report 10points POST #31 What fruit likes to go down slides?
Ki-wheeee! Report 10points POST #32 What’s a calendars favorite fruit?
Dates.
Ki-wheeee! Report 10points POST #32 What’s a calendars favorite fruit?
Dates.
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Report 10points POST #33 What did the little cob of corn call his father?
Pop Corn! Report 10points POST #34 Vegans think butchers are gross.
But people who sell vegetables and fruits are grocer. Report 9points POST #35 What was Prince’s favourite dessert?
Raspberry sorbet!
Pop Corn! Report 10points POST #34 Vegans think butchers are gross.
But people who sell vegetables and fruits are grocer. Report 9points POST #35 What was Prince’s favourite dessert?
Raspberry sorbet!
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Report 9points POST #36 What does a lemon say when it wants a hug?
"Give us a squeeze!" Report 9points POST #37 What kind of monkey doesn’t eat bananas?
An orangutan! Report 9points POST #38 Why do oranges do so well in school?
They concentrate!
"Give us a squeeze!" Report 9points POST #37 What kind of monkey doesn’t eat bananas?
An orangutan! Report 9points POST #38 Why do oranges do so well in school?
They concentrate!
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Report 9points POST #39 Why did the apple pie go to the dentist!
Because it needed a filling! Report 9points POST #40 Why do oranges wear sun cream?
Because their skin peels! Report 9points POST #41 What did the daddy tomato say when his child was falling behind on their walk?
"Ketchup!" Report 9points POST #42 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Figs."
"Figs who?"
"Figs the doorbell, it's broken!" Report 9points POST #43 Some fruits turn into other fruits.
For example, wait long enough and blueberries will turn into elder berries.
Because it needed a filling! Report 9points POST #40 Why do oranges wear sun cream?
Because their skin peels! Report 9points POST #41 What did the daddy tomato say when his child was falling behind on their walk?
"Ketchup!" Report 9points POST #42 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Figs."
"Figs who?"
"Figs the doorbell, it's broken!" Report 9points POST #43 Some fruits turn into other fruits.
For example, wait long enough and blueberries will turn into elder berries.
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Report 9points POST #44 Why did the apples get a divorce?
They weren’t a very good pear. Report 9points POST #45 What does Matthew McConaughey say when he’s picking fruit?
"All ripe, all ripe, all ripe." Report 9points POST #46 What’s a gorilla’s favorite fruit?
Ape-ricots.
They weren’t a very good pear. Report 9points POST #45 What does Matthew McConaughey say when he’s picking fruit?
"All ripe, all ripe, all ripe." Report 9points POST #46 What’s a gorilla’s favorite fruit?
Ape-ricots.
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Report 9points POST #47 What does a pear tree do before growing its fruit?
It pre-pears. Report 9points POST #48 The magician says, “And now for my final trick! I will disappear!”
Then he grabs a pear from under the table and says, “You’re the worst fruit ever!” Report 9points POST #49 "My friend told me, “Did you know trees drop edible stuff that’s not fruit?” I said, “That’s nuts!”" Report 9points POST #50 What kind of fruit will fix your sink?
A plum-ber.
It pre-pears. Report 9points POST #48 The magician says, “And now for my final trick! I will disappear!”
Then he grabs a pear from under the table and says, “You’re the worst fruit ever!” Report 9points POST #49 "My friend told me, “Did you know trees drop edible stuff that’s not fruit?” I said, “That’s nuts!”" Report 9points POST #50 What kind of fruit will fix your sink?
A plum-ber.
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Report 9points POST #51 What happens when you step on an orange?
You hurt its peelings. Report 9points POST #52 What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
Blood orange! Report 9points POST #53 What are twins favorite fruits?
Pears.
You hurt its peelings. Report 9points POST #52 What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
Blood orange! Report 9points POST #53 What are twins favorite fruits?
Pears.
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Report 8points POST #54 What do you call bad fruits and vegetables?
Gross-eries. Report 8points POST #55 "Driving past a corn field I planted and told my wife how great it feels to see the fruits of my labor. She paused for a few seconds before replying, "Those are vegetables, dummy." Report 8points POST #56 "I went on a couple of dates last week at the local supermarket.
Gross-eries. Report 8points POST #55 "Driving past a corn field I planted and told my wife how great it feels to see the fruits of my labor. She paused for a few seconds before replying, "Those are vegetables, dummy." Report 8points POST #56 "I went on a couple of dates last week at the local supermarket.
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The grocer was outraged, and said I destroyed his fruits." Report 8points POST #57 "Last night I dreamt I was swimming in an ocean of orange lemonade, it was a Fanta-sea!" Report 8points POST #58 Why are oranges the fastest fruit?
They never run out of juice! Report 8points POST #59 "I’ve got a great idea for an orange peeling machine, I hope it bears fruit!" Report 8points POST #60 Why are grapes always so unhappy?
They’ve got nothing to wine about!
They never run out of juice! Report 8points POST #59 "I’ve got a great idea for an orange peeling machine, I hope it bears fruit!" Report 8points POST #60 Why are grapes always so unhappy?
They’ve got nothing to wine about!
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Report 8points POST #61 What is a ghost’s favorite fruit?
Boo-berries. Report 8points POST #62 What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm!
Boo-berries. Report 8points POST #62 What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm!
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Report 8points POST #63 Why is it so difficult to work at an apple pie factory?
They have such a high turnover rate! Report 8points POST #64 Why did the worm leave the apple?
Because Noah said to travel in pairs! Report 8points POST #65 What do you get when you put an iPhone in a blender?
Apple juice!
They have such a high turnover rate! Report 8points POST #64 Why did the worm leave the apple?
Because Noah said to travel in pairs! Report 8points POST #65 What do you get when you put an iPhone in a blender?
Apple juice!
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Report 8points POST #66 Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
He just couldn't concentrate! Report 8points POST #67 What did the fruit say when he was surprised for his birthday?
"Wow...
He just couldn't concentrate! Report 8points POST #67 What did the fruit say when he was surprised for his birthday?
"Wow...
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I'm s-peach-less!" Report 8points POST #68 Where do baby apes go to sleep?
In an apricot! Report 8points POST #69 Why was the peach late to work?
He had to make a pit stop on the way!
In an apricot! Report 8points POST #69 Why was the peach late to work?
He had to make a pit stop on the way!
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Report 8points POST #70 What do you call a snake made out of pineapple?
Ananas-conda! Report 8points POST #71 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Olive."
"Olive who?"
"Olive you. Do you love me too?" Report 8points POST #72 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bean."
"Bean who?"
"Bean a while since I've seen you!" Report 8points POST #73 Two fruit flies are out on a date.
One says to the other: “This date is amazing.”
The other replies: “Yeah, but it’s already half-eaten.” Report 8points POST #74 Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes…
You need to let that mango.
Ananas-conda! Report 8points POST #71 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Olive."
"Olive who?"
"Olive you. Do you love me too?" Report 8points POST #72 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bean."
"Bean who?"
"Bean a while since I've seen you!" Report 8points POST #73 Two fruit flies are out on a date.
One says to the other: “This date is amazing.”
The other replies: “Yeah, but it’s already half-eaten.” Report 8points POST #74 Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes…
You need to let that mango.
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Report 8points POST #75 Why are bananas such popular fruits?
Because they have a peel. Report 8points POST See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #76 "I like to advertise my homemade fruit preserves at clubs.
Because they have a peel. Report 8points POST See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #76 "I like to advertise my homemade fruit preserves at clubs.
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Whenever a song comes on, I’ll hold up a jar and yell, “This is my jam!”" Report 8points POST #77 What kind of fruit do you give a guy when you want him to leave your home?
Mango. Report 8points POST #78 Which school subject yields the most fruit?
History — because it is full of dates. Report 8points POST #79 What happens if you sit on a grape?
It gives a little wine!
Mango. Report 8points POST #78 Which school subject yields the most fruit?
History — because it is full of dates. Report 8points POST #79 What happens if you sit on a grape?
It gives a little wine!
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Report 8points POST #80 What made the corn stalk mad at the farmer?
He kept pulling its ears! Report 8points POST #81 Why didn’t the fruit salad get sunburned?
It had plenty of melon in it. Report 8points POST #82 If an acrobat and a fruit crossed, what would you get?
An apple turnover!
He kept pulling its ears! Report 8points POST #81 Why didn’t the fruit salad get sunburned?
It had plenty of melon in it. Report 8points POST #82 If an acrobat and a fruit crossed, what would you get?
An apple turnover!
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Report 8points POST #83 When do you go at red and stop at green?
When you're eating a watermelon. Report 8points POST #84 Why do watermelons get upset so easily?
They’re melondramatic! Report 8points POST #85 What car do fruits use to get around in?
A lemon.
When you're eating a watermelon. Report 8points POST #84 Why do watermelons get upset so easily?
They’re melondramatic! Report 8points POST #85 What car do fruits use to get around in?
A lemon.
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Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #86 "Two bullies at school keep putting fruits inside my son's bag. I wish they'd leave him melon." Report 7points POST #87 How do you fix a broken berry?
With a strawberry patch!
With a strawberry patch!
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Report 7points POST #88 A lorry full of berries crashed on the motorway.
It’s created a huge jam! Report 7points POST #89 What’s a scarecrow’s favourite fruit?
Straw-berries!
It’s created a huge jam! Report 7points POST #89 What’s a scarecrow’s favourite fruit?
Straw-berries!
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Report 7points POST #90 What do you call a cat who eats lemons?
A sourpuss! Report 7points POST #91 Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad!
A sourpuss! Report 7points POST #91 Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad!
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Report 7points POST #92 Lemons and limes fight all the time.
They are bitter rivals! Report 7points POST #93 "I went to the shop today to get lemons and limes but they didn’t have any. It was a fruitless trip!" Report 7points POST #94 Why did the lemon cross the road?
It wanted to play squash!
They are bitter rivals! Report 7points POST #93 "I went to the shop today to get lemons and limes but they didn’t have any. It was a fruitless trip!" Report 7points POST #94 Why did the lemon cross the road?
It wanted to play squash!
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Report 7points POST #95 Why did the lemon go to the doctor?
It was feeling sour! Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #96 "I went to the doctor because I had a strawberry growing out of my ear.
It was feeling sour! Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #96 "I went to the doctor because I had a strawberry growing out of my ear.
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He gave me some cream for it!" Report 7points POST #97 How did the fruit basket get across the lake?
They took the straw-ferry! Report 7points POST #98 Why do oranges wear sun cream?
Because their skin peels!
They took the straw-ferry! Report 7points POST #98 Why do oranges wear sun cream?
Because their skin peels!
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Report 7points POST #99 "A guy kept trying to sell me tropical fruit. I told him "mango!"" Report 7points POST #100 How do you make an apple turnover?
You push it down the hill!
You push it down the hill!
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Report 7points POST #101 Did you hear about the fruit that gave people a warm fuzzy feeling?
It was a real peach! Report 7points POST #102 What did the pitted fruit say when he got in a fight?
You want a peach of me?!
It was a real peach! Report 7points POST #102 What did the pitted fruit say when he got in a fight?
You want a peach of me?!
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Report 7points POST #103 How do you fix a broken tomato?
Use tomato paste! Report 7points POST #104 Why did the cantaloupe jump into the swimming pool?
It wanted to be a watermelon! Report 7points POST #105 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Orange."
"Orange who?"
"Orange you going to let me in?" Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O.
Use tomato paste! Report 7points POST #104 Why did the cantaloupe jump into the swimming pool?
It wanted to be a watermelon! Report 7points POST #105 "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Orange."
"Orange who?"
"Orange you going to let me in?" Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O.
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Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling #106 Why was the baby strawberry sad?
Because its parents were in a jam. Report 7points POST #107 What is Romeo and Juliet’s least favorite fruit?
Can’t-elope. Report 7points POST #108 Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
Because its parents were in a jam. Report 7points POST #107 What is Romeo and Juliet’s least favorite fruit?
Can’t-elope. Report 7points POST #108 Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
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Report 7points POST #109 What is Beethoven’s favorite fruit?
A ba-na-na-naaaa. Report 7points POST #110 "My favorite fruit is the pear. Because if you have two and you eat one, you still have a pear left." Report 7points POST #111 Why was everyone shocked when the fruit fly’s girlfriend agreed to marry him?
Because the pair had only ever been on rotten dates.
A ba-na-na-naaaa. Report 7points POST #110 "My favorite fruit is the pear. Because if you have two and you eat one, you still have a pear left." Report 7points POST #111 Why was everyone shocked when the fruit fly’s girlfriend agreed to marry him?
Because the pair had only ever been on rotten dates.
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Report 7points POST #112 When does an apple become grumpy?
When it’s a crab apple! Report 7points POST #113 Brown, hairy, and with sunglasses, what are you?
A coconut on vacation.
When it’s a crab apple! Report 7points POST #113 Brown, hairy, and with sunglasses, what are you?
A coconut on vacation.
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Report 7points POST #114 How do you make a lemon drop?
Just let it fall. Report 7points POST #115 Why did the orange go blind?
He didn’t have enough vitamin-see!
Just let it fall. Report 7points POST #115 Why did the orange go blind?
He didn’t have enough vitamin-see!
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Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples #116 What do you call two banana peels?
A pair of slippers. Report 7points POST #117 Did you hear about the two fruits who weren't allowed to get married?
Turns out they cantaloupe.
A pair of slippers. Report 7points POST #117 Did you hear about the two fruits who weren't allowed to get married?
Turns out they cantaloupe.
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Report 6points POST #118 "Help! I've been canned with preserved fruits!
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I guess you could say I'm in a jam." Report 6points POST #119 What's the similarity between an apple and an orange beside that both are fruits?
Both are not a banana. Report 6points POST #120 Where do baby citrus fruits go to learn?
A lemon tree school.
Both are not a banana. Report 6points POST #120 Where do baby citrus fruits go to learn?
A lemon tree school.
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Report 6points POST #121 "I always get my fruits mixed up, but don't point it out to anyone. I don't like being in the lemonlight." Report 6points POST #122 Where do baby citrus fruits go to learn?
A lemon tree school! Report 6points POST #123 Orange is a great fruit.
It’s citrically acclaimed!
A lemon tree school! Report 6points POST #123 Orange is a great fruit.
It’s citrically acclaimed!
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Report 6points POST #124 Why did the apple pie cross the road?
It saw a fork up ahead! Report 6points POST #125 What pie did the scientists use for their experiment?
A peach tree dish! Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) #126 "I always like bragging about the very small hatchet I own.
It saw a fork up ahead! Report 6points POST #125 What pie did the scientists use for their experiment?
A peach tree dish! Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) #126 "I always like bragging about the very small hatchet I own.
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I’ve done some research on it and as it turns out, it’s from the 1850’s and was used in some rich guy’s home to chop up citrus fruits for desserts and cakes etc. My wife thinks it’s boring, though. She says, “It’s just an antique lime axe.”" Report 6points POST #127 "My door-to-door fruit delivery business failed terribly because of my horrible interpersonal skills.
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I was driving people bananas." Report 6points POST #128 If Adam and Eve each took two bites out of the apple…
They would have four-bitten fruit. Report 6points POST #129 When two bananas meet, what do they do?
A banana shake! Report 6points POST #130 Can you guess what kind of vegetable is the most likely to like rock and roll?
An ear of corn!
They would have four-bitten fruit. Report 6points POST #129 When two bananas meet, what do they do?
A banana shake! Report 6points POST #130 Can you guess what kind of vegetable is the most likely to like rock and roll?
An ear of corn!
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Report 6points POST #131 Do you know what happens if you cross fruit and bowling?
A banana split. Report 6points POST #132 When someone steals a fruit drink, what do you call them?
A smoothie criminal. Report 6points POST #133 How many cranberries grow on a bush?
All of them.
A banana split. Report 6points POST #132 When someone steals a fruit drink, what do you call them?
A smoothie criminal. Report 6points POST #133 How many cranberries grow on a bush?
All of them.
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Report 6points POST #134 What did the grape say to the peanut butter?
"Tis the season to be jelly!" Report 6points POST #135 What is Darth Vader’s favorite fruit?
Empire apples. Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs #136 What tree produces fruit that tastes like chicken?
Poul-tree. Report 6points POST #137 What is a banana’s favorite gymnastics move?
The splits!
"Tis the season to be jelly!" Report 6points POST #135 What is Darth Vader’s favorite fruit?
Empire apples. Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs #136 What tree produces fruit that tastes like chicken?
Poul-tree. Report 6points POST #137 What is a banana’s favorite gymnastics move?
The splits!
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Report 6points POST #138 Did you hear about the piece of fruit that left its wallet at a George Michael concert in Zurich?
It was a careless Swiss pear. Report 5points POST #139 What’s half fruit, half dog and is rather sad?
A melon Collie.
It was a careless Swiss pear. Report 5points POST #139 What’s half fruit, half dog and is rather sad?
A melon Collie.
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Report 5points POST #140 Scared of eating genetically modified fruit?
Grow a pear. Report 5points POST #141 What did the sweet potato tell the pumpkin?
"I yam what I yam." Report 5points POST #142 In the fruit salad world, what is called a messy salad?
A “fig-sty”!
Grow a pear. Report 5points POST #141 What did the sweet potato tell the pumpkin?
"I yam what I yam." Report 5points POST #142 In the fruit salad world, what is called a messy salad?
A “fig-sty”!
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Report 5points POST #143 During World War II, which fruit was most commonly used?
The pineapple grenade. Report 5points POST #144 What made the plum put sugar under its pillow?
So it could have sweet dreams.
The pineapple grenade. Report 5points POST #144 What made the plum put sugar under its pillow?
So it could have sweet dreams.
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Report 5points POST #145 Green and square, what is it?
A lemon in disguise. Report 5points POST #146 What did one raspberry say to the other on Valentine's Day?
"I love you berry much." Report 5points POST #147 Why aren't bananas ever lonely?
Because they come in bunches!
A lemon in disguise. Report 5points POST #146 What did one raspberry say to the other on Valentine's Day?
"I love you berry much." Report 5points POST #147 Why aren't bananas ever lonely?
Because they come in bunches!
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Report 5points POST #148 What did a mum say when she drank her son's strawberry shake?
"That was berry nice." Report 4points POST Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!
"That was berry nice." Report 4points POST Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!
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Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda!
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Add Your Answer! Not your original work?
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Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB.
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Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Neilas Šurkus Follow Unfollow Neilas Šurkus Author, BoredPanda staff Neilas is a SEO List Curator for Bored Panda.
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Title Update Neilas Šurkus Follow Unfollow Neilas Šurkus Author, BoredPanda staff Neilas is a SEO List Curator for Bored Panda.
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Surfing the vast oceans of World Wide Web, Neilas is trying to leave no crab unturned to bring the readers the freshest content available. Neilas often finds himself lost in making music, sim racing, watching movies, TV Series and playing video games in his free time.
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Read more » Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Writer, BoredPanda staff Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.
Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia.
Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia.
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Ask her anything! Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app!
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You May Like 80 Of The Funniest Puns Ever Akvile Petraityte 100 Country Jokes To Kindle Your Wanderlust Saimonas Lukošius 50 Times People Saw Hilarious Puns And Just Had To Share Them On This Dedicated Online Group Austėja Akavickaitė Popular on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out European Is Shocked To Learn How American Suburbs Work, Goes Online To Ask Some Accurate Questions "Never Come Back To My Restaurant": Chef Bans Rude Restaurant Patrons And Gives $1,350 Bill To 22 Y.O. Employee They Disrespected I Used AI To See What These 30 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, And Here's The Result (New Pics) Write comments POST POST Popular on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) Popular on Bored Panda Employee Laughs In Boss' Face For Saying It's "Unethical" To Make Plans After Work, Takes The Case To The Director People Are Roasting Airbnb For Getting Completely Out Of Hand, Here Are 30 Of The Most Savage Tweets "Lost In History": 50 Pictures That Shed A New Light On Our Past Management Introduces Disciplinary Rules To Make Most Of Employees, Freaks Out When They Turn The Rules Against Them 32-Year-Old Independent Modern Woman Draws Comics On Her Observations About Society (30 New Pics) Employee Gets Told They're "Replaceable", So They Play Along And It Ruins The Company User Submissions The Best Microscopic Photos From The Nikon Small World Photomicrography Competition 2022 (92 Pics) I Am So Passionate About Creating Mystical Art, Here Are Some Of The Magical Notebooks I Have Made (23 New Pics) 30 Comics About Making It Through Life While Fighting Mental Health Issues By This Artist “I Own An Official Nanosecond”: 35 Rare Items Owned By Our Community I Photographed This Ukrainian Village Because It Is My Solace That Inspires Me (38 pics) By Changing His Lifestyle And Eating Habits At Age 60, Steve Ramsden Has Successfully Lost Over 60 Lbs And Now Has A Body Of A Bodybuilder Almost finished...
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To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Like what you're reading? Subscribe to our top stories Subscribe Please enter email address Also on Bored Panda 50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Had To Share Them On This Facebook Page 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 50 Times People Spotted Stupid Design Decisions In Public Places And Just Had To Share European Is Shocked To Learn How American Suburbs Work, Goes Online To Ask Some Accurate Questions I Used AI To See What These 30 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, And Here's The Result (New Pics) This Online Group Is Dedicated To Things That Are Inexplicably Satisfying, Here Are 50 Of The Best Ones (New Pics) Employee Laughs In Boss' Face For Saying It's "Unethical" To Make Plans After Work, Takes The Case To The Director "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight" 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs Employee Maliciously Complies To Work Only His 8 1/2 Hours, Makes The Company Lose $85k Per Year Chefs Are Sharing 30 Common Cooking Mistakes We Need To Avoid People Are Roasting Airbnb For Getting Completely Out Of Hand, Here Are 30 Of The Most Savage Tweets "Lost In History": 50 Pictures That Shed A New Light On Our Past 32-Year-Old Independent Modern Woman Draws Comics On Her Observations About Society (30 New Pics) Woman Buys Ex-Hoarder's Home With All Of Their Belongings, Spends 4 Years Cleaning When Relatives Start Demanding Heirlooms They Didn't Want 23 Y.O.
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Son Tells His Parents He’ll Never Speak To Them Again After Finding Out They’re Paying For Sister’s Education Yet Didn’t Pay For His "Never Come Back To My Restaurant": Chef Bans Rude Restaurant Patrons And Gives $1,350 Bill To 22 Y.O. Employee They Disrespected The Best And Worst Transformations Seen During School Reunions, As Shared By These 30 Internet Users “I Felt So Shaken Up”: Woman Leaves Family Trip After Eavesdropping On Husband’s Conversation With Mother-In-Law 50 Times Teachers Hung The Funniest Signs In Their Classrooms And They Ended Up Being Praised Online Employee Gets Told They're "Replaceable", So They Play Along And It Ruins The Company Management Introduces Disciplinary Rules To Make Most Of Employees, Freaks Out When They Turn The Rules Against Them Dad Overhears A Conversation Between His New Wife And His Son, Cancels The Mother’s Day Celebration He’d Planned Woman Goes Viral With 7.7M Views When She Shares That Her Date Called Her An Uber To Go Home After He Saw How She Was Dressed Also on Bored Panda Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" And 30 People Deliver Sincere Answers “AITA? I Went On Vacation With My Friend And Her Family, They Kicked Me Out So I Got My Own Room And Stayed On” Chefs Are Sharing 30 Common Cooking Mistakes We Need To Avoid 50 Times People Spotted Stupid Design Decisions In Public Places And Just Had To Share 23 Y.O.
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Son Tells His Parents He’ll Never Speak To Them Again After Finding Out They’re Paying For Sister’s Education Yet Didn’t Pay For His 50 Times Teachers Hung The Funniest Signs In Their Classrooms And They Ended Up Being Praised Online Artist Creates Fun Comics With Unpredictable Endings That Poke Fun At Our Society (30 New Pics) After 2.5-Week ‘War’ With 3 Cats, Woman Contacts Vitamix Asking For Empty Boxes To Replace The One Her Cats Took Over With New Blender Inside 30 People Who Quit Their Jobs With Style (New Pics) Clueless Director Calls For A Meeting Over Mass Resignation After Company Cancels WFH, Employee Explains It In A Way He Would Understand 30 Informative And Fun Food Charts For Anyone Trying To Eat Smarter This Online Group Is Dedicated To Things That Are Inexplicably Satisfying, Here Are 50 Of The Best Ones (New Pics) “I Felt So Shaken Up”: Woman Leaves Family Trip After Eavesdropping On Husband’s Conversation With Mother-In-Law Woman Buys Ex-Hoarder's Home With All Of Their Belongings, Spends 4 Years Cleaning When Relatives Start Demanding Heirlooms They Didn't Want Dad Overhears A Conversation Between His New Wife And His Son, Cancels The Mother’s Day Celebration He’d Planned Employee Maliciously Complies To Work Only His 8 1/2 Hours, Makes The Company Lose $85k Per Year "You Are So Beaut-OHGOD!": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics) 50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Had To Share Them On This Facebook Page Woman On TikTok Calls Out Airbnb Tenant's Entitlement When She Realizes That She Has To Do Chores Despite $125 Cleaning Fee "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight" The Best And Worst Transformations Seen During School Reunions, As Shared By These 30 Internet Users 30 Of The Most Spine-Chilling Things Kids Have Ever Said, As Shared In This Viral Twitter Thread Woman Goes Viral With 7.7M Views When She Shares That Her Date Called Her An Uber To Go Home After He Saw How She Was Dressed ‘Old Photos In Real Life’: 35 Pics That Show How Much Time Affects Everything (New Pics) Follow We're also on Instagram and tumblr App Store App Store User Submissions Hey Pandas, How Often Do You Forget Something Important, And What Was The Result? 35replies 21 points Hey Pandas, Share Pics Of Your Halloween Decorations 4comments 22 points This Artist Continues To Create Amazing Logic-Challenging Photo Manipulations (70 New Pics) 5comments 33 points Hey Pandas, What's Something You've Made Yourself?
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(Closed) 6comments 29 points I Created My Own Dark Tarot Deck Featuring Creepy Creatures And Demons (78 Pics) 16comments 53 points This Artist Reimagines Brazilian States As Video Game Characters (22 Pics) 9comments 30 points Hairstylist Shares 30 Women Who Took The Risk Of Cutting Their Hair Short And Got Awesome Results (New Pics) 75comments 51 points Hey Pandas, What Is The Weirdest Name For A Human You've Ever Heard? (Closed) 80replies 21 points Artist Creates Adorable Images Of Dressed-Up Animals With References To Star Wars, The Hobbit And More (44 Pics) 23comments 61 points "An Amazing World Right Under Your Nose": 24 Pictures Of Nature That I Took With A Macro Lens 7comments 43 points Get the App App Store App Store Google News © 2022 Bored Panda
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